People Are Losing Their Shit Over Starbucks Cups, And It’s Fucking Hilarious

WAAAARGARBL

Starbucks recently unveiled their holiday cups for this year. The design is quite simple; it’s basically just a plain red cup, as you can see in the picture above (the cup contained a salted caramel mocha, by the way, and it was delicious). This post isn’t really about the cup, however. It’s about a certain segment of the population’s reaction to the cup.

You see, apparently a plain red cup is a symptom of the “War on Christmas” that a certain subset of Christians likes to complain about. I find this to be pretty god damn funny, because (a) the war on Christmas isn’t, you know, real, and (b) because it’s a red disposal cup, and really not worth the amount of hatred people are putting into this. It’s not like Starbucks decided to make a red cup with no other decorations FOR THE GLORY OF SATAN.

What makes it even better is that people apparently aren’t even boycotting this, which is a rational response when a company does something you don’t like. Nope, a bunch of people have actually stated that they’re going to Starbucks MORE now, and giving their names as “Merry Christmas” to the baristas. You know, to trick the liberal heathens into wishing them a merry Christmas.

Now, for all of you whose knee-jerk reaction to this is to say “not all Christians!”, please know that I am fully aware of that fact. I know plenty of Christians who are wonderful (and most of all not ridiculous) people. I’m only mocking the ones who are complaining over the existence of this cup.

Of course, Poe’s Law is certainly a thing, so it’s entirely possible that the person who started this whole thing is trolling us all. Then again, people this ludicrous do actually exist, so it could still be true.

Still, thank you Internet, for giving me a good chuckle.

New Star Trek Series Coming in 2017

star trek

In news that has recently made me squeal at a pitch only audible to dolphins, there is going to be a new Star Trek series starting January of 2017. You have no idea how excited I am about this. Apparently, it’s going to feature an all new cast and stories, so it doesn’t sound like it’ll be a reboot or a remake.

I am extremely excited about this. Star Trek is a major part of both my and my sisters’ childhoods. Our mom used to watch the original series back when it originally aired, so we used to watch Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, and Voyager together back when they aired. I saw First Contact (my second favorite of the Trek movies) in the theater, and the soundtrack to that movie was one of the first CDs I’ve ever owned. So,yes, very excited about this.

This is definitely something that I will be following, and will be providing updates on this blog as they become available. In the meantime, I think I’ll go watch me some original series episodes. To Netflix!

The Pinnacle of Video Game Advertising

So, I own a Kindle Fire. The particular Kindle Fire that I own has advertisements that show up on the lock screen. It was cheaper than the other models on Amazon, and I’m mostly able to just ignore the ads that show up on it anyway, so it doesn’t really bug me that much.

However, there is one particular ad for the mobile game Game of War. Even though I don’t have a particular interest in smart phone games and pretty much zero interest in this one, it warms the cockles of my cold, dead heart every time that I see it. Now, this isn’t the ad that appears on my screen, but it gives you the idea.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you: Mariah Carey, Warrior Princess:

Behold!

The ad that actually shows up is even better, as you actually get a full body shot of the very Xena-esque outfit she’s wearing. Here’s the actual TV spot, using her song “Hero,” that you can watch in its full one-minute glory.

I just have so many questions. Is someone blackmailing Mariah Carey? Does she owe money to the mob or something? Does she still even record music? I haven’t really heard anything about what she’s done since Glitter.

I don’t want to get too down on it, though. The ad was obviously meant to be tongue in cheek, and it does have some amusing moments. Not enough to actually make me want to buy the game, but still.

Ch-ch-changes…

Hello, all! You may have noticed that the blog’s name has changed. Well, I’ve been doing some thinking, and realized that I was never really fond of Nuclear F Bombs as a name, but at the time it was the best that I could think of to name a blog. Therefore, Nuclear F Bombs is dead, long live Nuclear F Bombs. Welcome instead to…

 

WRATH OF THE BITCH QUEEN.

 

I think it’s a better name, and one that certainly amuses me more than the previous title. Also, World of Warcraft-based puns give me life. I will have an actual post (one that I’ve been planning for quite some time) coming up soon.

Thank you, and good day.

World of Warcraft: Legion

(Note: I am aware that this was announced several days ago. I have been trying to collect my thoughts about this so that it comes out coherently instead of me typing “OH MY GOD” over and over again.)

Most of you have likely already seen the below video:

Yup! Blizzard is putting out another WoW expansion, and so far it looks like it’s adding some fairly interesting new features. There’s going to be a new zone (The Broken Isles), class order halls, and artifact weapons (you can apparently wield THE FUCKING ASHBRINGER).

What I’m looking forward to, though, is the new hero class: demon hunter.  They are looking incredibly badass. Kind of disappointed that there are no new playable races, though. Where are my playable vrykul, Blizzard?

I will probably have more thoughts on this as new information becomes available.

Why I hate the phrase “guilty pleasures.”

I don’t believe in guilty pleasures. If you fucking like something, like it. That’s what’s wrong with our generation: that residual punk rock guilt, like, “You’re not supposed to like that. That’s not fucking cool.” Don’t fucking think it’s not cool to like Britney Spears’ “Toxic.” It is cool to like Britney Spears’ “Toxic”! Why the fuck not? Fuck you! That’s who I am, goddamn it! That whole guilty pleasure thing is full of fucking shit.

-David Grohl

So, guilty pleasures. It’s a phrase that a lot of people tend to throw around. It’s something that’s based around the idea that there are just certain things we aren’t supposed to like, or at least like seriously.

In case you couldn’t tell, I agree wholeheartedly with Mr. Grohl: Guilty pleasures are bullshit.

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