Month: March 2020

Mythology Monday: Icarus Is A Dumbass

Today’s story is one that you are probably quite familiar with, considering that it’s the source of a popular idiom that means “to overreach.” So, yeah, we’re going to talk about Icarus, and how he would have been fine if he’d just, you know, listened to some very good advice.


Game Review-Animal Crossing: New Horizons


Release Date: 3/20/20
Publisher/Developer: Nintendo
Platform: Nintendo Switch
Price: $59.99 USD

So, I don’t know if you folks have noticed, but shit kind of fucking sucks recently. Thankfully, there’s a new game that will help take your mind off that, at least for a little while.

Animal Crossing has been one of Nintendo’s most popular series since the first game came out in 2002 for the Gamecube. The premise of the series is fairly simple: you’re a regular human, moving to a village populated by inexplicably anthropomorphic animals. Throughout the game, you can do things like sell bugs, fish, and fruit to the local vendor in order to make money, which you can then use to purchase or expand your home, buy furniture, clothes, and other items.

This game actually takes that premise a step further: rather than moving into an already established village, you’re moving to a deserted island and have to build one up from scratch. To that end, they added a new feature: a souped-up version of the crafting system from Pocket Camp. Unlike Pocket Camp, however, you actually make the items in question yourself, and there’s no waiting period: the item is available as soon as you craft it.

This is something that makes it quite easy to furnish your home without having to spend a lot of the game’s currency, bells. For example, here’s an image of my house’s interior. Every item in the home was crafted, except for the moss ball and the fish:


As far as crafting is concerned, you can actually gather materials for that pretty easily. Wood, for example, is gained by hitting trees with axes (naturally), and you can also get branches by shaking them. Rocks, clay, and other minerals are gathered by hitting rocks with a shovel or an axe. It should be noted, though, that the tools in this game do deteriorate over time, but you can craft most of them pretty easily. It also adds a couple of new tools: the vaulting pole, which you can use to cross rivers; and the ladder, which is used to scale small cliffs to explore other areas of the island.

New Horizons, of course, has a multiplayer feature as well. By going to the airport, you can either visit your friends’ islands, or have them come to yours. Also, you can use the game’s secondary currency, Nook Miles, to fly to randomized islands, which is a good way to gather new resources, or even invite new animal villagers to come to your island.

Speaking of Nook Miles, they work similarly to the MEOW coupons from the previous title, New Leaf. They’re basically extra points that you can get by doing things around the island, which you can then exchange for plane tickets, new crafting recipes, or items that expand your inventory.

Visually, the game is quite nice, with a lovely cartoony style that complements it’s general tone. It’s cute, is what I’m saying. It’s very, very cute.

So, would I recommend this game? Yes, of course I would. I think we could all use a little light-heartedness right now.

Though, given current circumstances, I would probably recommend buying it digitally.

(So, fun fact: my job is furloughed indefinitely because of the pandemic! Whee! What that means is I have no idea when I’ll be getting my next paycheck. Fortunately, I have Patreon and Ko-Fi, so if you’d like to support the blog, that’s where you’d do it. Thanks!)

Silent Hill 2 Retrospective, Part 1-Synopsis


(Content warning: this game deals very, very heavily with themes of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse, as well as suicide, illness, and loss. If these topics are triggering to you, you might want to sit this one out.)

If you recall, a while back I wrote a series of posts about one of my favorite games, Silent Hill. I figured that now is a good time take a crack at that game’s sequel, 2001’s appropriately titled Silent Hill 2.

So, to kick this off, I’m going to go over the game’s plot. I highly recommend playing the game if you’re able, as it is something best experienced first hand. Otherwise, by all means, read on.


Mythology Monday: Vasilisa The Beautiful


Today, we’re going to take a look at a Russian folk tale that starts off rather familiar, but then goes completey off the rails.

So, to start off with, we have a merchant and his wife. The two of them have a beautiful daughter named Vasilisa. One day, when Vasilisa is about eight, her mom comes down with an unspecified illness and dies.

Before dying, though, she hands her daughter a doll, and tells her to feed it whenever she needs help. Turns out that the doll is magical and comes to life whenever she gives it food or drink. This comes in very handy later in the tale.

Some time passes, and the merchant decides it’s time for him to find himself another wife. He meets a wido with two daughters, they hit it off, and eventually get married.

And then they live happily every after.

Just kidding, the stepmother and stepsisters proceed to make Vasilisa’s life hell, basically making her a slave in her own home. Why the dad doesn’t put a stop to it, I don’t know, but let’s move on.

Some more time passes, and Vasilisa grows up to be, you guessed it, beautiful. This leads to her getting a lot of male attention, whcih pisses off the stepmother to no end because no one even looks at her own daughters. So, as you can imagine, she decides to plot her stepdaughter’s death.

She gets her chance when her husband leaves for an extended business trip. As soon as he’s out the door, she gathers the other three up and heads to a house at the edge of a very dark, very intimidating forest. Specifically, it’s the forest of the fearsome Baba Yaga.

For context, Baba Yaga is a prominent figure in Slavic folklore. She’sa forest witch with a mobile house and a penchant for eating people. In other words, not really someone you’d want to encounter.

One day, the stepmother and stepsisters blow out all the candles in the house. They’re all like, “Whoops, we have no way to relight these candles. Vasilisa, head out to the woods and see if Baba Yaga has a light.”

Before they can protest, they shove her out the door and shut it. With no real options, Vasilisa heads out into the woods.

While on her way, she comes across three dudes: one in white on a white horse, one in red on a red horse, and a third in black on a black horse. The last one she sees when she comes across Baba Yaga’s hut. Which is decorated with human bones, including a whole bunch of glowing skulls.

Vasilisa is rooted to the spot with fear, so just stands there up until Baba Yaga actually comes home. Baba Yaga asks her why she’s standing in front of her house, and Vasilisa gives her the rundown on her predicament.

Baba Yaga thinks for a moment, then says, “OK, I’ll give you a light if you do some household chores, then spearate out dirts specks from my wheat and poppy seeds. If you fail, I’ll just eat you.”

Vasilisa agrees, and Baba Yaga goes to bed, at which point Vasilisa gives her doll a snack. it wakes up and is like, “Don’t worry, girl, I got this.”

The next day, Baba Yaga leaves to do whatever it is she does, and Vasilisa and the doll get to work. Amazingly, between the two of them, they manage to finish it all before she returns home.

Baba Yaga is disppaointed by this, but knows when she’s beat. She summons three pairs of disembodied hands to take the poppy seeds and wheat before handing Vasilisa one of her skulls to use as a light.

She then asks the girl if she has any questions, and Vasilisa asks about the three horsemen she saw. Baba Yaga explains that they’re the day, the sun, and the night respectively, then asks if she has anything else she wants to ask. Vasilisa is about to ask about the hands, but then decides that she doesn’t really want to know and says, “Nope, I’m good.”

Baba Yaga then asks how Vasilisa managed to finish her tasks so quickly, and she responds that it was through her mother’s blessing. Baba Yaga responds, “Nope, don’t want no blessings around here,” before telling Vasilisa to GTFO.

Vasilisa, skull in hand, makes it back to her house. Instead of lighting the candlles, though, the skull ends up incinerating her stepmother and stepsisters. Which is pretty hardcore.

With her problems murdered, Vasilisa buries the skull. She then heads into town, where she apprentices herself to a weaver and ends up marrying the tsar.

So, as you can see, there are a number of similaries between this story and the tale of Cinderella. If Cinderella didn’t fuck around wiith the shoe nonsense and just straight up killed her horrible family.

Which is pretty god damned metal if you think about it, and totally fitting for Russia.

(So, fun fact: my job is furloughed indefinitely because of the pandemic! Whee! What that means is I have no idea when I’ll be getting my next paycheck. Fortunately, I have Patreon and Ko-Fi, so if you’d like to support the blog, thtat’s where you’d do it. Thanks!)

In Which I Shamelessly Beg For Money

So, fun fact: on Monday, I got a call from my supervisor stating that I was going to be on furlough until the end of the month. Then I got called into a Skype meeting today saying that a bunch of us are now on furlough indefinitely.

Basically, this means that as of today, I’m basically laid off for the foreseeable future. This is because a bunch of my company’s clients have all but shut down, so there just isn’t any work available.

I did apply for unemployment, but that might take a while to get through and there is a possibility that my application could be rejected. So, this blog, which was previously just a side hustle, is now basically my main hustle.

To that end, I am now pushing my Patreon and Ko-Fi sites a bit more vigorously. If you are able to donate, please click the links below, as it would go a long way to help me out.




In the meantime, I offer you a Wesley in these trying times.